Carsen Talk

I am so excited! I think I figured out how to store, view and share my videos from my DSLR!  This was my first video upload.  Carsen likes to "talk" with his daddy!

Therapy Thursday!

My alarm rings at 5:45 A.M.  I am curious as to where the night went because I feel like I have only slept an hour.  I am realizing my late evening workouts are disturbing my sleep.  I am quite certain I burn more calories at night than during the day.  Exhaustion of an early morning brings me to my feet and ready for the day!  I have my coffee in hand (with low-fat creamer and 1 tbsp of sugar, they cancel eachother out :)  I also have Carsen's camo braces, special socks, puma shoes, vitamin water and Carsen in hand.  It is 7:01 A.M.  We drive off into the dark morning and I notice slivers of sunshine trying it's hardest to peak out from the horizon.  I have a lot on my mind this morning so I am thinking a 50 min drive is exactly what I need.  Most thoughts that drift through my mind are of Matt and Carsen.  I ponder about all the little things in my life I am so grateful for.  I feel so blessed to be Carsen's Mommy.  I know I have said that in just about every other post, but I feel so priviledged to be the mother in town who has challenges and that others can see that I am not perfect, I have difficult days and I make the best of them.  The blonde and the brunette have been so much fun to get to know.  They listen to me, grieve with me and laugh with me.  Sometimes, I hate where I live.  To be honest, I think it would be so awesome to be surrounded by other kids in the same situation as Carsen.  Lately, I am realizing that he doesn't need to be like all his friends.  These adorable little munchkin's we have running around are the BEST for Carsen.  I will have to blog more on those cuties later.  I am rambling and my brain has so much to process today.  Since I am thankful for so many people, I have to mention a few of Carsen's therapist's.  Today was a short day.  He had OT first and then PT.

Carsen's OT Chrissy, working on picking up wooden cookies.  He loves to clap them together and push them around.  He has been working on putting and object into a bucket instead of only taking the object out.  No tears with this fun activity! Chrissy is great at keeping Carsen focused and challenged!

New tasks are fun for me! As I am sure they are for Carsen.  Carsen tried out the Lite Gait today for the first time.  It allows him to use partial weight and to be supported while walking on a treadmill.  I really think he is going to improve his balance and strength with this device, so I am excited. 

Carsen's PT Tasha, is helping him maintain correct positioning.  She has been with Carsen from the start of therapy and has been awesome to work with!!

Carsen is giving me the eye, I am worried he will be able to run longer than me one of these days.  I am up for the challenge!!

Thankful days are the best.

Now, a nap with Carsen would top off our day!! 

3 years ago...

Three years ago, tonight, I was 39 weeks gestation and routinely cleaning my house until 11:00 P.M.  I was getting ready for the arrival of our first child.  Little did I know, I was nesting.  How could I not have recognized that?  Anyway, my house was spotless so nothing else really mattered.  My head hit the pillow and the first one came.  I thought, "Okay, that was totally a braxton hicks, right?"  Five minutes later, another one. 

Me: "Umm, Matt, wake up...I have had contractions for 10 mins." 

Matt:  "Are you sure?"

Me: "Ah yeah, I'm sure, these are painful!!"

So, I get up to shower and within 15 minutes I am already rocking back and forth.  (OH GOD!!!)

Needless to say, I had spent the next 8 hours rocking with pursed lip breathing in Carsen's room, watching Matt sleep on the floor. 

My Nurse Midwife and I were talking about my unusual labor about a year ago.  She said "I still don't know why you were in so much pain."  I stated that it was probably just that he was face up.  She said, "I haven't had a delivery like you had, since, and if I had, I would have quit my job." 

After 18 hours, enough was enough, I was shot and signed myself up for a C-section.  (I told them they could kill me if they wanted :)  Something just wasn't right I kept thinking!

Three years ago today, I was able to hear him cry and finally hold him in my arms...

"It's a Boy!!"

His name is Carsen Thomas. 

I hope blood doesn't bother any of you reading this.  My favorite part of this picture is Matt squeezing my hand and trying to be behind the curtain with me, but peeking to get a good look at his little boy!

Matt was so proud to hold his little buddy that he couldn't take his eyes off him.  I, of course, am so out of it that I just kept smiling for the camera.

He had the most amazing dark, soft hair.  A whole 8 lb 5 oz!

My little angel!  I am so blessed to have Carsen in my life. 

Happy 3rd Birthday Carsen!

Mommy and Daddy love you so much!

Diary Post # 2

Aww...days off.  There is nothing really like them.  You know those days off that you don't even care if you do anything productive.  Yes, one of those days!  That is the kind of day we had!  Only, I actually did shower, put my make up on, a few loads of laundry and some therapy time with Carsen.  I didn't feel pressured to get anything done.  I wish i felt like that more often. 

Working part-time has been one of the best decisions I have ever made.  I don't know how those mom's that work full time do it.  How do you get those loads of laundry done?  Healthy supper's? Workout's? Appt's made?  I always say my time off life, is going to work.  I am able to shut out my life, my stressors, my worries and just enjoy taking care of people that need some TLC.

This has been a rough week for Carsen.  (As you can tell by his last post)  He was not digging daycare much either.  Now, that his daddy is gone for 4 days, he is stuck with boring mom.  I am trying to play fun, goofy dad.  I am getting more giggles than usual, so I must not try hard enough!

Today, I put Carsen in his new birthday gift!  He had worked hard on standing and using those skinny little arms to hold him up.  So, I gave him a break.

I threw a little ELMO on...and he was off in la la land...

He wouldn't even crack a smile...Just studying the movie.

For those of you that don't get to see Carsen tired very often, he sucks his two middle fingers on his right hand and covers his fingers up with his left hand.  He started to cover them up when he was really little so that we wouldn't pull his fingers out of his mouth.

Playing with his lip...

Maybe a little bit of a smirk???

Uh oh! I am busted!

Our new favorite exercise!  Put him in a corner and have him stand.  It is so cute to see him so tall.  He doesn't fall over this way and is more confident with standing.  Why didn't we think of this before?  He loves it!  And I enjoy doing something new!

Playing Peek-a-boo! (The black on his nose is still from his cow balloons!)

The beautiful flowers Matt had sitting on the counter when I got home yesterday.  Just because.

They smell amazing and Carsen thinks they are pretty cool too!

I am excited to see what tomorrow brings!

Carsen's "Sorry" Letter

dear bridget, mary, sharon, kristin, sonia, all other therapist's and all shoppers at the hallmark store,

i am so sorry for being so crabby today.  my mommy is so annoyed with me today that she is sitting at the computer eating left over frosting from my birthday party.  i think she gets frusterated when she drives 2 hours for therapy and then i cry the whole time.  i really love you all and think you are the best, but i was just trying to tell you that i wanted to play at home.  as soon as i got home, i had so much fun playing with my cow balloons and giggling at mommy while she took pictures of me on the floor.  sometimes, she has no idea what i need, so she just plays with me and everything is all better.  just so you all know, i am not sick, tired, hungry or mad...i just wanted to get your attention today.  i love you all so much!

this is how happy i was when i got home today...

love,
CARSEN

(He is a stinker, love him to pieces but I don't think that many fits in a day are necessary :)